This Hawaiinan forgiveness ritual is deceivingly simple. When I bought the book, it was shorter than I expected and I thought "this is it?" But then I started practicing it and it forced me to acknowledge that I was holding onto grudges because I felt that I was right and they were wrong. And I realized that this was my ego. My ego was protecting my feelings by justifying my thoughts, words, and actions.
The practice is four statements:
Please forgive me.
I love you.
When I first started the practice, I picked an "easy" subject to test out since I thought I had gotten over it many years ago - my ex-boyfriends! I held my first test subject in my mind and said the magic words and my reaction was something like "I'm sorry you were such a jerk, I don't need your stinkin' forgiveness to move on, thank you for teaching me who I didn't want to be with, and I love my life without you."
Wow, okay. I didn't realize I was still holding onto relationships that had ended over a decade ago. I was really surprised!
So I worked through the practice when I could fit it in, which was commuting on the metro to and from work. It softly guided me to what I was still holding onto (the hurt and the betrayal) and it allowed me to recognize that there were "wrongs" committed on both sides that I was sorry for them. And when I asked for forgiveness, I was also forgiving them. And when I said thank you, I was giving gratitude for the experience of personal growth. And when I said I love you, it was also acknowledging that I love myself... all sides of myself... not just the self that my ego wants others to see.
This website has a good article that summarizes this beautiful practice. I hope Ho'oponopono will help you let go of emotions that your ego justifies holding onto so that you can move forward with more ease and love for your whole self.