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happiness isn’t the goal


Is your goal to live a happy life? At one time, that was one of our main goals too.


We believed that once we achieved a certain status/salary/age or waited until something happened, THEN we would attain happiness in some aspect of our lives. We worked hard to achieve those milestones and earn those accomplishments, and although we were grateful for all we had, we couldn’t shake the longing for more. We found ourselves confused and embarrassed that good enough didn’t seem good enough, not quite understanding why the shine from within didn’t burn as bright as we expected.


By pausing and reflecting on this pattern, we realized that the goal to be happy wasn’t supposed to be the goal at all. Happiness is the side effect of achieving the next step to help ourselves live in alignment with who we truly are.


We’ve talked about it before, we can’t know how to help ourselves if we don’t know ourselves first. That is the first crucial step and it’s a doozy all on it’s own. But once we started on the journey of reconnecting with ourselves again, we then could move on to having the hard and honest conversation to figure out what’s keeping us stuck in a cycle where good enough isn’t good enough.


It’s essential that we pause from our packed schedules to reflect on what naturally brings us excitement with little effort. Take a moment and notice what natural gifts we bring to this world with ease. Unfortunately, these sparkles in our life can get buried by years of cultural biases, social expectations, pressure from our loved ones, and self-doubt.


But it’s this sparkle that shows us who we truly are. Some may call this our purpose or dharma. It’s unfortunate that when things come easy to us, we usually dismiss them. When we enjoy doing something, we typically under-value its worth to our community. And this is the pattern that many of us live day after day.


It’s when we make the decision to make space for our natural talents, to invest time to do the things we love, to align our goals to doing more of what makes us shine, this is when happiness is a side effect of you doing you.


It’s a simple concept but not easy at all. We both struggle with this daily and find ourselves feeling stuck sometimes with our negative reel blasting that we couldn’t, we shouldn’t, we don’t have it in us.


But when we’re ready to get back on the wagon and get out of our funk, we come back to our tools to help us pause, reflect, and reconnect with that sparkle within us. Because when it comes down to it, the path to the happiness that we seek is already within us. And ming+ming is here to help you find that pause in your busy week to remember that.


With love,

Ming-Wai + Ming-Cee

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