When we know things just aren’t right, we can feel it in our bodies. We show up as an alternative version of ourselves, like the evil anti-hero who's easily annoyed, demanding, and ready to pick a fight.
Even though it's in these moments we know it’s time to make a change, sometimes we're just not ready. We tighten our grip on our bad habits because, frankly, it's easier and they can feel so damn good.
When we come across this tug-o-war of feelings we are at a crossroad and we have a choice. We can decide to go in the same direction and expect the same results, or we can try something different. The problem with trying something different is that it takes effort to change and it takes time to see results.
The process of change can feel like we're trying turning around a packed cargo ship in stormy weather. Many of us have set our course years (if not decades) ago and we've collected so much baggage along the way that our ships are heavy and difficult to navigate. This makes sense that it would take so much time and effort to just crank the steering wheel.
The struggle occurs when we've been floating on the same trajectory for many years, and the ease of the momentum allows us to never have to feel the strain of turning the wheel. But when we finally realize that we've been cruising in the wrong direction, just the idea of turning the wheel can become so overwhelming we stay stuck.
However, by understand how difficult it is to turn the wheel and go in a different direction, we can shift our perspectives in accepting that it's going to take time and continuous effort to turn things around. In other words, this allows us to set realistic expectations, and begin experiencing change in our lives.
With big change comes struggles and it takes time. It's difficult and heavy and that can keep us stuck in the beginning. Especially when we live in a world where we've been conditioned to expect immediate gratification. When we make hard changes to our lives, we want to see the results right away. So it’s not actually the change that we’re fighting so hard against, but instead it's the time and discomfort that comes with it.
Through our own journeys we've learned that though we might be in calmer waters today, stormy weather is inevitable because change is hard. But we've also discovered that we can help ourselves by lightening our loads, making our ships easier to steer. More importantly, we've realized that we are the captains of our own ships and we have the power to steer them in new directions--not just where momentum will take us.
If you’re ready to let go of the idea that change happens quickly and you want to start redirecting your own cargo ship, then we can help. Our classes provide the tools you’ll need to help you shift your perspective and give you real expectations to achieve your first hard steps and start moving in the direction you truly desire.
With love,
Ming-Wai and Ming-Cee